Getting divorced is not only about the looming thought of navigating through the world of family law, it is about feeling frozen, lost, confused and alone during one of the most stressful times in one’s life.

The Coach

A divorce coach will offer you knowledge, guidance, strategies and options when starting the process. They will assist in answering the most common questions when someone is contemplating a separation; ‘Where do I start, What lawyer do I hire, what are my legal rights and most importantly, will I be able to manage putting an agreement together and how is it going to look when all is completed?’ All these unanswered questions cause anxiety, stress and fear. The process is overwhelming and not only can these emotions hinder you from taking the first step to begin on a path towards a new life it can keep you stuck in a place of indesciveness and turmoil.

The Strategy

A divorce coach will help you understand a clear strategy and purposeful execution based on your goals, interests and needs. They will help you focus on action and positive results through knowledge and critical thinking at the beginning of the process to help you develop and understand the pieces involved in a separation negotiation before you retain professionals. They will help you manage those pieces and any professional parties, to reduce your costs paid in to the legal system and ensure a forward moving negotiation.  They will offer insights on the dynamics of separating and present emotional and practical tools to help manage the changes that come with a separation.

They will provide you information relating to Family Law to assist you in understanding your rights involving parenting agreements, property and asset division and support obligations to assist you to feel informed and knowledgeable.

Hiring a Lawyer

Often, individuals hire a lawyer recommended from a friend, family member or colleague without giving much thought as to what the objectives are, the traits of the person whom you are negotiating with, which lawyer the other party has or may retain and what the approach and style may be of the potential counsel. All these questions are critical factors in how the negotiations will unfold. A coach will not only guide and recommend which lawyer may be the best fit for you, but also advise you on what questions to ask and what to focus on. Lawyers focus on Family Law and we need them in this process and a Divorce Coach will ensure you are prepared for the legal system, any lawyer you choose and guide you every step of the way.

The Options

Retaining legal counsel is the first critical step and a coach will then navigate you through your options ranging from negotiating directly with the other party, mediation, arbitration and litigation. Not every option works for every situation and they will assist in informing you of all the details of each strategy available and work with you and your lawyer if need be, to determine and ensure the chosen process is best for you.

Getting to Work

Once you determine what option is best for you, the work begins. Financial disclosure must be gathered and compiled, correspondence reviewed, position summaries identified and documented, affidavits prepared and perhaps court appearances scheduled to name a few things. A coach will guide and ensure you are on track, advise you on next steps and what is to come as well as negotiation techniques throughout your process. They will continue to meet with you individually or with you and your lawyer to ensure a forward moving negotiation in the direction you have determined from the start.

The Results

Separation and divorce is an emotional, stressful and devastating time for everyone involved. A Divorce Coach fosters a feeling of empowerment and will assist in reducing the anxiety, costs paid in to the legal system and help minimize the triggers that cause uncertainty with unwavering support and ensuring you are focused on action and results.

They understand ending a marriage is not just about finances and the legal implications. It is a combination of understanding the process and how to execute it effectively, compromise and self-care.

Diane Horsman
Bold Consulting

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