I will never forget the night my husband came home and told me something wasn’t “right” in our marriage. Shocked and confused, I still believed everything would work out. I convinced myself that after 15 years of marriage, and 3 amazing kids we would get through this hurdle together and that Divorce would not be an option.
And after a year of therapy, and discovering an affair and a lot of lies, I finally realized that my marriage was over and that divorce was inevitable. Shocked and scared, I was lost in the whirlwind of fear.
It has been 10 years since that ‘unplanned” milestone in my life, and I have learned so much about myself in the process. I will not lie – the first few years after our divorce were extremely tough, with a lot of disappointment, pain, and distrust.
The turning point towards healing was when I finally accepted that I would never make sense of “’why” my marriage ended. Could I have been a better wife? Had more sex? Seen the signs? These haunting questions did not matter any more once I made the decision to move on with my own happiness. Surviving a divorce has made me be stronger.
I have learned (with the help of a great life coach) to have less fear and take more risks. I cherish my friends and family who were there to comfort me while I was down but also there to push me forward, encourage me to reinvent and not let me stay stuck in my story.
Today my relationship with my children is stronger than ever. I discovered a passion for painting and have created a career around it, and am in a loving relationship with a new partner.
This path took a lot of years of hard work and dedication—but it was worth it. I now know that I am in control of my own destiny and happiness and approach it with confidence and trust.