We are trying to work out the best arrangement for the kids. Some say every other week – some say one night a week and every other weekend. How do you know if your decision is what is right for the kids or right for you? I don’t want to only have my kids every other weekend and one night a week but my wife is telling me that I am being selfish and not considering what the kids need.
my kids see their dad once a week and on every other weekend and also spend the holidays with them – it seems to be working for us but everyones case is different – its had to assess yours without knowing the details!
The kids generally want to know that both of their parents are happy and that they are loved. There is no right or wrong. You can always test things out. How old are your kids? They will generally tell you what they want and what is working and not working.
We started as week on, week off. The kids let us know that it was too long for them to be away from each of us so we put an overnight in mid-week. That seemed to work better for the kids.
I have helped clients work through many different scenarios. What works for one does not necessarily work for another. The most important thing however in all cases is that the children feel heard, understood and cared for.