I am so sorry to hear this. This may sound a little cliche, but with everything going on around you try to love you again. Right now it’s not about him, it’s all about you. Adding more stress to your life is the last thing you need to be doing. You said you feel so lost. There are things that are out of your control, accept that and control that which you can. Sit in silence, still your mind start with 5 minutes a day and work your way up the answers will come just listen to the silence and love yourself. right now your mind is working overtime, slow it down a little and then you will be able to think more clearly. Everything starts with you.
First of all, you are not broken don’t ever refer to yourself as broken. Never allow another human being to have power over you. I can relate to what you are going through and I’m sure it hurts like hell. When I found out my husband was cheating on me, I started drinking and I don’t even like the taste of alcohol, but I wanted something to ease the pain, needless to say, it didn’t work. It only made me feel sick. Looking back in retrospect I had to love me, I had to find the love for me in me. I questioned myself for a while, thinking maybe if I would have done this or that differently, he would not have cheated on me. But if a man is going to cheat he is going to cheat regardless, nothing can stop that, it’s just in his DNA. As far as your friend goes now you know where you stand.
Check out my website as women we should be there for each other. I will be interviewing a woman who will tell her story as to what she went through and how she is coping with it. You are not alone