Home Forum General Not sure what to do Am I Crazy for Wanting Divorce? Reply To: Am I Crazy for Wanting Divorce?

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Mary S

I think it is normal that you feel the way you do under the circumstances.  But…I will say to tell you to divorce is not for anyone else to decide.  You and anyone else would want some relief, that is normal.  Divorce does not make the difficulties go away.  You will still be dealing with her issues because you have a child together.  And that will most likely make it more difficult to see or spend time with your daughter.  I am not condoning her behavior that is making you miserable.  It’s just that I would like to point out what comes with divorce.  I have been married and divorced twice.  The last one, recent.  I can see the errors of my ways but at the time did not although my ex’s had very difficult things to deal with too. So we all have our differences and issues.  She may have some things she is dealing with that causes her to act the way she does.  The thing is would it be worth it to try to somehow work through these with her as a last effort to avoid divorce?  I am no expert and am not saying do not leave her but that trying to work through this to come to a good resolution might help you to avoid additional tough feelings after you divorce if you do.  Everyone is different so maybe some can go on and think nothing of it but for me, my heart aches. (my 2nd ex is already engaged again for the 5th! time).  I say this to say, the next one will have their issues too, maybe different than your current wife, but still has issues.  Marriage is tough no doubt and takes two willing to be grown up and deal with their issues in a healthy way.  Seems most WILL NOT AND most have a line that once crossed it’s over.  I wanted to face the problems was willing to address my stuff compromise the best I could yet still be myself and then when it came down to him wanting to divorce I wanted to handle it in a non hurtful way but resolve things so we could both move on without adding more baggage for each of our futures.  Did not happen.  I just feel cruddy about all of it but for him, he wiped me off and moved on like I never existed.  Who is better off?