My husband and I have been together a total of 20 years for 14 of which we have been married. It’s the second time round for both of us. No children between us but each with two each from previous, all adults.
He has always had anger issues (I really should have seen the writing on the wall). When he loses his temper he is vile. Name calling, mud slinging, that kind of thing. Every holiday has been ruined by these tantrums. He’s abandoned me in foreign countries many times. Lots of nights out have been ruined in the same way. He’s done it occasionally in company! He’s never really got physical in his abuse apart from the odd push and most recently a cup of water in my face.
A year ago we sought therapy as a couple and him independently for anger management. I had to ask for a couple of weeks apart to sort my head out after the water throwing incident and when he returned there was the usual conversations around this time being the absolute last time.
The 12 months leading up to now have not been horrrndous but….. the anger when things go a little bit wrong is still there and we’ve had a couple of altercations. The last one tipped me over the edge and I told him I wanted a divorce. Ive not come to this decision on the back of one argument. I just don’t feel the same about him and probably haven’t for some time.
I’m definitely going to see it through but I don’t understand why I feel so sad.
Can anybody help and support me through this?