Home Forum General Cheating Spouses My husband told me he loves me but is not "in love" with me…. Reply To: My husband told me he loves me but is not "in love" with me….

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So, as most of these stories go, I too was told that my husband loves me, but is not in love with me.  We have been married 20yrs and have 2 children.  Our marriage was what I would consider typical and I also felt like it was strong.  We had our ups and downs, but I never in a million years thought of divorcing…My husband had a near death experience in March 2018, and says that when he came to, that he felt different, that he realized that he had not been happy for about 10yrs–just going through the motions….never said a word!!    After this experience he became distant, rude, and selfish—I told him that the man I married 20yrs ago died that day, and some new guy showed up that I dont care for….My husband would never have hurt his family like this, he would never think of himself over his children, he would never say such hurtful things to me.

Of course I am hurt, devastated, angry and not trusting of him after finding out that he was speaking to a younger woman from work–he swears nothing ever happened just a couple conversations…I really dont know what to believe.   Our daughter who is our oldest child will not speak to him at all, she is very angry…Our son is playing Switzerland and really doesnt know the whole story or I think things would be different for him as well.

I in turn went into full throttle mode–called the realtor, placed the house for sale, contacted an attorney and made him move to his mothers, put a bid in on another home for my kids and I…..last night he wanted to know why I was pushing for this so fast….said that even if we get a divorce it doesn’t have to be over???  One day he wants to work on it, the next day he doesnt…..I am so torn and confused!!!

Any advise….